Sunday, June 7, 2009

Random Parenting Thoughts and Life Lessons

Wow! It's been a while since I've last posted. There have been a lot of things going on, not least of which is the brand new adventure of potty training. After vehemently resisting for months, our oldest finally responded positively to our efforts to begin potty training. To say it's been an adventure would be an understatement. However, it has been a real eye-opener in a number of regards.

Like any parents starting off with this adventure for the first time, we quickly procured all the necessary supplies: child's potty seat, training pants, potty treats, books, etc. We quickly learned, however, that "our ways are not always his ways." Shortly after our son finally was able to figure things out on his small potty seat, he immediately decided he was big enough for the real thing. What he soon discovered, however, that an adult-sized potty seat was not designed for small child-sized posteriors. Apparently, the only position in which he could properly use the toilet is also the most uncomfortable position, having to hold himself up in a rather awkward position to keep himself from falling through.

A similar experience happened just yesterday when we worked through his Saturday night hair washing. Like any little kid, our son detests washing his hair. For the most part it comes from the pain of getting the soapy water in his eyes. Usually during dinner, when he knew it was Saturday night and time for a bath, he would commence a sort of bargaining with us:
--"I don't want to wash my hair with the pitcher."
--"Don't worry, we won't wash your hair with the pitcher."
--"I don't want to use the red cup. I want to use the yellow cup."
--"The yellow cup is too small, we need to use the red cup."
--"But I don't want to use the red cup. I want to use the yellow cup."
--"Ok, if you eat five carrots, we'll use the yellow cup."
--"Three carrots."
--"No, you need to eat five carrots."
[Eats five carrots.]
--"Ok, we'll use the yellow cup"
--"No, I want to use the blue cup."
--"Thank you for eating your carrots, but we need to use the yellow cup."
--"But I don't WANT to use the yellow cup!"
...
I think he would have tried to argue us all the way down to washing his hair with a thimble if he could have. Well, despite his best efforts and all his debating skills, it was apparently in vain, because no matter how small a cup we used to wash his hair, he would still get a little bit of soap and water in his eyes. We finally found that if we had him hold on to the faucet and look up at the shower head, we could shield his eyes from almost all the water. So far this method has worked pretty well, but given his traumatic past experiences with hair washing, he still gets himself scared to tears each time we try it. It must seem very opposite his intuition to keep water out of his eyes by looking up, but that really is what works the best.

Looking at my son work through all these new challenges and experiences, I wonder what a loving Heavenly Father thinks when we are learning to struggle through our own life lessons. How often are we in too big a hurry to "grow up" and do things "our way," and thereby force ourselves into an admittedly uncomfortable situation, completely ignoring the help a loving Father tries to offer us? Do we have the faith to "look up" in our hardest trials, even when we are terrified to do so, and our own limited intuition doesn't understand it at all? I know our Father loves us and really tries to reach out to us. Looking back I feel so silly for all the times I try to proclaim myself "the boss" of my own situation, when I find that all my wisdom and learning is really no more than a preschooler's over-zealousness to "grow up." Well, it appears it's time to learn about buttoning a shirt and rushing off to church. Maybe there's a lesson there too.

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